03 May 2015

Don't Label Me

I am pleased and proud to announce my new picture book, Don't Label Me:

The artwork is amazing, too.

Enjoy & In Joy

The Accidental Art of Dis-Pleasing

I get it. I'm old.

I grew up in an age... well, also in a place... of mutual respect and giving. Not giving of money or material things, but of time, effort, caring, and pulling together. No doubt you've heard tell of barn raisin's and the like? It's not a myth. I attended a few in my youth. Granted, the A-dults did all the heavy work, but the kids witnessed the intangible generosity and fellowship.

...and partook in the tasty grub.
Small town mentality may be passe, but it certainly had that going for it - people pitching in to help one another the best they could; banding together to solve myriad plights like building a barn in a day for a neighbor, or searching for a lost dog.

Shout Out, Landertown!!
The world has moved on.

No one appreciates, they expect.

If their expectations don't come to complete fruition - say, their dog isn't found even though you searched for a month every spare minute you had, not only did you not help at all, somehow it ends up being your fault the dog wasn't found. Hell, if you wait long enough you may find you're to blame for the dog missing in the first place.

Because the mentality of this new age, apparently, is not the effort - it's the results. If the dog isn't found - you've done nothing to find it. For had you done anything at all - anything worthy - anything of note - the dog would have been found. Simple as that. Don't you understand??? (Nope, me neither - but it's what I'm told).

So... if busting my butt to help you out gives me the same accolades (or lack thereof) as, say, ignoring your dilemma, staying home and drinking a glass of wine...

Guess which option I'm taking the next time your dog goes missing.

As much as I hate to admit the actions of one other human being is causing me to change a core value of mine, I'm taking my ball and going home.

The next time anyone says they "need" my help, I'm handing them the frigging phone book and pouring myself a glass of wine.


15 February 2015

Time to be Happy

It's been a while. How've you been? Have you got the time... to listen to another of my ponderings?

Today is the day after Valentine's Day, or what I now like to call, "Singles' Awareness Day" thanks to Facebook.  Thoughts are muddling around in my head like cattle to the slaughter.

I'll leave that up to your imagination.

Mostly, I've been thinking about relationships, and why some work out while others don't.

I recently read an article from Psychology Today: The Vampire's Bite, and it cleared up some of my misconceptions.  

For the longest time I thought I may be lacking some funda-mental part of my psyche which doesn't allow me to have a normal, functional, romantic relationship. 

Maybe in past relationships I saw mutual attraction that wasn't there. Maybe I was looking through rose-colored glasses. Maybe I wanted so much to not be alone, I made up this person's affections for me...

Well, apparently...

...and chances are, neither are you.

Consider this (from the above article):

     "If some man were to say to your daughter: 'Here's the deal, sweetie. For several months or so, I'm going to pretend to be everything you ever wanted. I'll shower you with attention, affection and all manner of stuff to make you feel special. Then, once I know you're depending on me as your significant other, and have made a commitment, I'm going to quit pretending and be who I really am. I'm going to start treating you really badly. I'll say insensitive things, I'll lie, I'll cheat, I'll be really cruel, possibly humiliate you in public.'

     "If your daughter whipped out the pen to ink the deal, you'd smack her and say, ‘What are you, NUTS? This guy's a lunatic!!!’ Right? But that IS the deal. That is the contract. If that contract wouldn't be nearly good enough for your daughter, why would it be good enough for you?"

I'll take mental abuse for life, Alex...

Take heart the temporarily loveless of you out there. Because sometimes, just sometimes, it isn't you. 

You deserve a significant other who's not mental and who'll treat you with kindness and respect. Don't forget that. Be patient; that person is out there. Who knows? You may already know them. It's time to be happy.

And, have a happy Half-Priced Chocolate Day.

Enjoy & In Joy

pass the popcorn, please!