I told him I’d have to see what the damages were before I made that decision, but probably cash…
He read back over my order and gave me a grand total of…
I said I’d have to pay with check as I had just enough and not any for tip.
“Wait a minute, then. If you pay with check it’s 25¢ more.”
“Because that’s what our manager makes us charge for checks…”
“Tell your manager I think s/he’s an idiot!”
“I don’t think I should do that.” I think that’s what he said anyway – he was laughing kinda hard.
“Oh... no... maybe you shouldn’t.”
Did you know they add a delivery fee and tip to your total?
Nope, me neither….
When the girl delivered the pizza to my door, I told her I was very sorry, but I would have to charge her a porch fee of $1… A strange expression crossed her face, not sure if I joked... and asked me why. I said:
“Oh, I’m sorry. I thought we were all now practicing levying arbitrary fees for obscure reasons.”
We went to the local carnival and I ordered one small drink for $2 - for the girlies.
The pimply-faced girl behind the counter informed me they didn’t have small drinks.
I inquired as to why they had ‘small’ indicated on their menu board.
She repeated they didn’t have any small drinks... as they didn’t have any small cups.
I looked at the price of a medium – which was $3… and said “How convenient,” and ordered a medium.
She handed me a huge, Styrofoam cup with no lid… (hasn’t anyone told these people about Styrofoam and our environment?)
“Do you have any lids?”
“Oh, how inconvenient! For three dollars, you think you could afford to give me a lid.”
“We only have lids for the small cups,” she said.
And you wonder why I’m glad I’m not from this planet.
In Joy & Enjoy